by Joy
D/J | Mature | AU/FT | 10 kb
Summary: Teal'c has some observations.
There are times when they do not notice me, here in the locker rooms or in the base gym. Sometimes, O'Neill will escort me to visit one of their drinking establishments. Bars, he calls them. I have heard the hypocrisy there, too. Sometimes, it is unbearable. Yet these are the places where I can observe what goes on, in secret, when they believe no one knows. It is because they do not notice me, even when I am clearly there. I cannot be missed, yet I have become what Daniel Jackson calls a fly on the wall.
It is strange and disturbing, this hypocrisy. Some taunt and ridicule men who enjoy intimate relations with other men, yet sometimes, it is the loudest amongst them that will be the first to accept those intimate relations.
I first observed this behavior with Colonel Makepeace. I would hear him talk, taunting others, slapping their bare skin. Yet there was one instance late at night when I observed him stepping out of a base storage room. His face was flushed, his lips red and swollen. Two minutes later, a lieutenant under his command exited the same room. He too was red-faced. It did not take a lot of imagination to guess what they had been participating in.
Other behavior similar to this has occurred within the showers, both in the locker room, and the gym. I have seen the evidence, the lubricating substance they use, the thin plastic cover they use to protect their organs with. I have heard the evidence, the slick sounds, the rapid slapping of skin against skin. The occasional stifled moans and gasps.
I have not been unaffected by this, but I have had years of discipline that keep me from reacting physically. If I wish it to affect me, I wait until I have reached the privacy of my quarters to consider what I have seen. I sometimes wish for that sort of companionship, but more often than not, I am satisfied to observe.
In that observation, I am glad to know that there are two men who do not participate in sexual hypocrisy. They are more of a free and open mind than the others. But O'Neill and Daniel Jackson are two men who puzzle me. They are attracted to each other, yet they do nothing. They perform rituals of word and gesture, of touches that are not so innocent yet are far from sexual. They look at each other in the showers when they think the other is not watching.
But I am watching. I see. And I see what they do not. For all their intelligence and astute thinking, they are blind to the attraction each has for the other. I have often considered informing them so I would no longer endure the ignorance they choose to operate in. But I do not. The reason for this is curiosity. I want to see how long it will take them to notice that the other watches, that one will develop an erect state when they stare at the other too long.
And here I am, having returned from one more mission, once again observing this bizarre avoidance, this dance of the repressed man within the locker room of SG-1. I am fully aware of the regulations, and I know why O'Neill would choose not to reveal himself to Daniel Jackson. But he has never been one to stick to a regulation when he truly wants something. It is only a matter of time.
I believe the truly enigmatic one is Daniel Jackson. He has no such regulation barring him from approaching O'Neill, though the military regulation would forbid O'Neill from responding. I do not believe O'Neill would oblige the regulation if Daniel Jackson 'made a move' on him. Certainly, Daniel Jackson has never let any rules get in his way, save those that are of his own ethical and moral making. So why does he not approach O'Neill? Perhaps he is insecure. There has been evidence of this, and sometimes, O'Neill has behaved most inappropriately and caused such insecurity in his friend. However, Daniel Jackson has a stubbornness that will refuse to obey those feelings of insecurity. Eventually.
When we were off-world and bedding down for the night, he looked long at O'Neill, and I thought that it would finally be the night that Daniel Jackson would tell O'Neill how he feels. But this morning, things were as they were the night before. It seemed to me that O'Neill appeared disappointed, but that image did not last long. It never does. One sip of coffee, one unobserved look, and it is suddenly business as usual.
I look inside the shower now and I see them through the semi-opaque cubicles. Washing. They are talking, as they sometimes do when a mission has gone well, as this last one has. O'Neill has asked Daniel Jackson home for dinner. And Daniel Jackson has accepted. Perhaps this will be the evening?
I hope this is so. This waiting is becoming unnerving.
.
I do not understand. It is apparent that nothing has changed. I detect no changes in either O'Neill or Daniel Jackson. This is becoming most tiring.
.
Something interesting has happened, yet I do not know the outcome as yet.
I have recently returned to my quarters after an evening which O'Neill refers to as Team Night, where the members of SG-1 gather socially. There have been many of these Team Nights and I have enjoyed them immensely. Most occur at a dining establishment, but some occur at O'Neill's residence.
This evening, we did not go to either. Instead, O'Neill invited us to join him at a drinking establishment called Mickey's, which is apparently known as an Irish Pub. We were seated at a table for four and after partaking of a selection of curious snacks, O'Neill suggested that a good way to have fun was to engage in a 'friendly game' of darts. O'Neill's propensity for competitive sports seems to include small projectiles bearing false feathers.
The game proved to be very good for one's physical coordination and visual acuity. We split up into partners, with myself and O'Neill versus Daniel Jackson and Major Carter. To coin Major Carter, she and Daniel Jackson 'kicked our asses'. After the game, which O'Neill insisted was not one of his better games and I agree, he challenged Daniel Jackson to a game of singles. 'A game' became five and Major Carter and I sat and watched them with growing amusement while O'Neill and Daniel Jackson insulted each other. I believe they were attempting to disrupt the other's concentration.
Near the end of the evening, while Major Carter had gone to the women's lavatory, I had the chance to catch O'Neill looking at Daniel Jackson's buttocks. Daniel Jackson had been aiming his dart at the board and he had taken that moment to look over his shoulder. In that moment, he too caught O'Neill looking. When O'Neill saw that he had indeed been caught, he grew flustered and looked in my direction. I did not look away. I smiled. Why that should have made him frown, I do not know.
He had taken a sip from his beer instead and Daniel Jackson turned his attention back to the board. It was then that I noticed that he was smiling.
When Major Carter had returned from the lavatory, she excused herself for the night, saying that she was going to return home. She offered me a ride back to the base and I accepted. Before she and I left, Daniel Jackson had also decided to retire for the night and asked O'Neill if he would give him a ride home because he had had too much to drink.
This is plausible reasoning, but Daniel Jackson had one beer to O'Neill's three. I knew then that that was what is known as a ploy on Earth. O'Neill seemed to know this, as well, yet he accepted Daniel Jackson's request.
I am going to 'cross my fingers' that something good finally happened.
.
Something has happened but whether it was good or bad, I am unable to tell. They were quiet today.
.
O'Neill and Daniel Jackson are the two most confusing people on this planet. Throughout the day, they had rarely spoken to each other as they normally do. I had been growing concerned, until I entered the locker room to retrieve several replacement towels for the weight room. I was quiet, but I do not believe that they would have noticed my presence had I entered with an orchestra.
It seems that something did indeed occur at Daniel Jackson's home. There were kissing sounds emanating from one of the shower cubicles, and if my experienced ears are to be believed, they were desperate and highly sexual. The voices were those of O'Neill and Daniel Jackson.
It seemed that Daniel Jackson had made the first move the night before. It is to O'Neill's credit that he accepted. I do not believe I care to know what would have happened had he refused.
My next personal assignment will be to determine a way to keep an eye on Major Carter and Doctor Fraiser. There is something going on between them, though I am almost certain nothing intimate has happened. I would have been one hundred percent certain had I not learned precisely how cramped the women's locker room closets are.
~
the end