By Fabrisse
Series Title: Relationships
Section Title: Brothers, part 2
Author: Fabrisse
Pairing: Nathan/Peter
Rating: ADULT - EXPLICIT
Word Count: ~1900
Category: Drama
Spoilers: Pre Season 1, minor for Season 2 through Four Months Ago
Summary: Peter and Nathan are brothers
Warnings: Masturbation, incestuous thoughts, mentions of teenagers having sex with each other
Betas: snopes_faith and riverfox
Notes: This came out of discussions at TwoP during the episodes Nothing to Hide and Six Months Ago about either how clueless Heidi was to the vibes between her husband and his brother or how complicit she was in the secret. Since the deleted scenes in Nothing to Hide give us Nathan at Annapolis and Angela calling Heidi a "townie" those two things have entered my personal canon. The overall story is in three parts, "Townie," "Brothers," and "Relationships." Each segment will have it's own rating, but the overall series is ADULT-EXPLICIT.
Nathan got two days leave for Thanksgiving when Peter wasn't quite eleven. As he was preparing for bed, he heard a noise from Peter's room and, thinking Peter's nightmares were back, rushed to help.
Instead he discovered a sticky, shocked, and mortified Peter who apparently had just had his first wet dream. Since Peter wasn't really sure what happened, Nathan found himself explaining all the stuff about puberty that Peter's class hadn't cover in health yet.
He finished by saying that Peter could ask him anything at any time, although he prayed Peter wouldn't.
Nathan had a brief reprieve.
A few days after Christmas, when Nathan had a longer leave, they had their big day together. It was a tradition now. Anytime Nathan was home for more than two days, one day was Peter's. Last year, he'd asked what Nathan wanted to do, and Nathan had taken him to two Broadway shows and dinner in Chinatown.
This year, they went to the Bronx zoo in the morning, but Peter asked if they could come back to Chinatown for dim sum in the afternoon. They barely made it before the final seating. The carts would come around for another half an hour or so, before the restaurant prepared for the evening meal.
They were on their second pot of tea when Peter started looking sheepish. Nathan waited patiently.
Finally, Peter blurted out, "I think I'm a pervert."
Nathan looked down at his food so Peter couldn't see his struggle to keep a straight face. "Why, Pete?"
"When I, y'know, dream," his face made eloquent what type of dream he meant, "sometimes I remember what I was dreaming about, and I don't think it's normal."
"I'm a firm believer that a man's fantasies are his own." Nathan took in Peter's reaction and realized his brother was seriously worried about something. "I don't know a lot about psychology, Pete, but since you brought it up, are you dreaming about hurting yourself?" A quick shake of the head answered him. "Are you dreaming about animals?" That got him a puzzled look and another head shake. "Little kids? Hurting or killing people? Being hurt or killed?" And now Peter was staring at him with utter revulsion and shaking his head.
"Those questions sounded weird, I know, but those are the things somebody who knows about psychology would think were serious problems. Anything else, is probably pretty normal."
"I think about people I know... sometimes."
"And probably people you see in a movie or on TV, right?"
Peter looked sheepish again. "Yeah." There was a long pause. "Sometimes, it's… guys." And at that Peter looked completely panicked.
"Afraid you might be gay?" Nathan did his best to sound gentle.
A very quiet, "Yeah," was his answer.
"Maybe you are. But that doesn't matter. The people who count in your life won't care."
"Dad would."
Nathan thought about it. Peter was probably right. "Then fuck Dad."
Peter managed to look both relieved and shocked. He started to giggle then became somber. "Would you care?"
"You're my brother, Pete. I love you. I reserve the right to threaten anyone you're dating, whether boy or girl, because that's what big brothers do. Answer me one question. Is it only guys you see when you, er, wake up?"
"No. More girls than guys, I think. I don't always remember."
"True confession then. I've thought of guys sometimes too. Probably more than you have because, when I was your age, I was at an all-boys school."
Peter looked at him like the dawn over the ocean. "Really?"
"Really." Nathan chuckled at Peter's relief. "Most of this is just you processing stuff in your dreams. When you're ready to start dating, and I pray to God your school has covered this better by then, you'll be able to tell if you like girls or boys or both."
Peter choked on his tea. "It's okay to like both?"
Nathan kicked himself, took a deep breath, and prepared to answer a lot more questions.
***
Peter knew Nathan's dream had come true. After a short-term assignment at Lakehurst, Nathan had been approved for flight school in Pensacola and graduated at the top of his class.
He hadn't thought before about Nathan being in danger because the Navy wasn't really involved in anything, but, when Nathan's assignment came through, it was in a war zone. Peter knew the US was doing something in Bosnia with a United Nations' force because his class had gone on a field trip to the U.N. If he'd known that was where his brother was going, he'd have paid attention.
The only good news was that the Roosevelt was stopping in New York. Nathan had two weeks between assignments and had been given permission to join his ship there. In his last letter, Nathan had promised him a whole day each week. He'd already decided to ask if they could go sailing together one day. The other day would be the Natural History Museum again, and then whatever play Nathan wanted to see.
***
The sailing day had been great.
The natural history museum was still one of Peter's favorites. Once or twice he'd seen Nathan glance over his shoulder, but Peter couldn't figure out what or who he saw.
On their way to the planetarium, they stopped in the men's room. When Peter came out, Nathan was talking to a woman with startling blue eyes. Without thinking, Nathan pulled Peter closer.
"This is my little brother, Peter Petrelli. Pete, this is Heidi Abbott. We met while I was at Annapolis."
Peter took her hand. "Nice to meet you," he said, and grew uncomfortable when Nathan and Heidi just stared at each other. "Nathan and I are in kind of a hurry."
Nathan's hand tightened on Peter's shoulder. "Excuse me a minute, Heidi." He led his brother out of earshot. "I've never known you to be rude before."
"Our tickets are in ten minutes, and I don't want to miss it." Unsaid were a whole raft of other things, including something in Peter that just wanted to scream because today was the last day he'd have with Nathan for years. It was his time.
Nathan's face softened. "We'll make it in time, I promise."
"Well, I know how you get around girls."
That got Peter a grin. Nathan leaned in and whispered in Peter's ear. "I've seen how you get around girls, too. Go and wait in the line. I'll be there in time for the show, and the rest of the day is ours."
Peter nodded. He waved to Heidi Abbott and ran to get in line.
The next night, Nathan went out to dinner with Heidi and came home, smiling, just barely late for their morning run. Peter's heart dropped, thinking Nathan was going to grab some sleep rather than run with him. But Nathan said, "Sorry, I'm late. I'll be ready in five minutes."
By the time Nathan came down, Peter was smiling. He'd decided that today was going to be the best day he could possibly make it because Nathan was leaving tomorrow at six a.m. He ached at the thought and wished he'd been the one who made Nathan smile like that.
***
Nathan might not think he was a pervert, but Peter still wasn't so sure. The wet dreams quieted down because he discovered jacking off which meant he could control the mess a little better.
Seventh grade changed how the girls in his class looked at him. Peter still wasn't tall, but he wasn't the shortest guy in the class anymore. And unlike the guys who felt they had to be 'cool' all the time, Peter would talk to girls about homework and books and things.
So much happened to him. Peter's first kiss was Sharon, and they were both too shy for it to be much good. The second kiss, though, was Patricia, and it was soft and a little wet and they'd smiled at each other for days afterwards. It gave him a huge amount of fantasy material.
Then there'd been Wendy's birthday party where he'd spent seven minutes in heaven with Wendy's arms holding him tight against her as they'd kissed and rocked a bit. Those moments had opened all sorts of new possibilities.
But it was going over to Allen's house to swim that made him wonder about himself. There'd been kissing and touching and rubbing. They'd both been in bathing suits, so there were lots of skin and nerve endings, too.
Peter didn't fantasize about Allen the way he did about Patricia or Wendy (or occasionally Patricia and Wendy) because Allen hadn't spoken to him after that day. It was difficult to fantasize about someone who wouldn't even acknowledge your existence. But he did think about the way Allen's cock had felt hardening against him, and the way Allen had just plunged his tongue into Peter's mouth. Allen made every move; he'd even tried to grab Peter's dick. And Peter was pretty sure Allen had come.
Allen excited him, but Allen's rejection also scared him.
There were two pictures of Nathan in his room, right by his bed. The first was of the two of them together with their arms around each other's shoulders – or as close to Nathan's shoulder as a pre-growth-spurt–Peter could reach. Ma had tried to get them to look at the camera, and in the print on the piano downstairs, she'd succeeded. Peter kept the "bad" copy: the one where they kept looking at each other and laughing.
The second snapshot was one he'd taken right after Nathan graduated from the Academy. The day was hot, and they'd gone to a concert in Central Park. Nathan had removed his tee shirt and poured water over his head to keep cool. When Peter called his name, Nathan had looked up, surprised. Peter stared at that photo a lot because he was sure he could see how much Nathan loved him.
This was why Peter was convinced he was a pervert. Because the best times he'd had jacking off, the kisses he imagined had been slow like Patricia's, the arms had been tight like Wendy's, and the hardness had rubbed against him like Allen, but they'd all been Nathan. And Peter felt loved.
***
Peter made it home by six. He had time for a quick shower before dinner at half past.
Jeanne was a nice girl, a sophomore to his freshman. They'd started studying together at her house about a month ago, but the studying had quickly become long, aching make out sessions. Today, she asked him to keep going rather than stop, and, wow, sex was better with someone else.
He knew he'd been a little quick off the mark, but Peter was pretty sure that Jeanne had come, too, and then they'd done it again and that was even better for both of them.
Peter made it down to dinner in time. It was just his mother; Dad must be working late again. They talked about school, Nathan extending his tour of duty on the Roosevelt, what was in the newspapers, whether Peter was required to go to Mass with them on the following Sunday, all the usual trivialities.
Just as dessert was finished, his mother stopped and patted him on the cheek. "I hope you were careful. Beginning tomorrow, there will be condoms under the sink in your bathroom. Use them. No one will keep count."
As she walked out of the room, Peter's jaw dropped.